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WellnessThe Autumn Issue · 5 minute read

Personal Protection & Everyday Readiness: Because Hoping for the Best Isn’t a Safety Plan

Trusting your gut, a small everyday-carry kit, a few digital safety basics, and why being polite to a stranger is not more important than getting home safely.

“There’s no harm in hoping for the best as long as you’ve prepared for the worst.” Stephen King

I have a confession. I love watching murder documentaries, true crime shows, and anything involving a suspicious husband, a missing person, or a detective who knows something isn’t adding up.

Some women relax with romantic comedies. I apparently unwind by studying how not to end up on Dateline.

I call it continuing education.

And before anyone questions my choice of entertainment, I actually pay attention. The warning signs. The strange behavior. The little details people brushed off because they didn’t want to seem rude, dramatic, or paranoid.

Which brings me to something I feel strongly about.

Ladies, listen to your gut.

Animals have survival instincts for a reason. A deer doesn’t hear something moving in the bushes and stop to consider whether running away might hurt the predator’s feelings. It gets out of there. Because ignoring danger in the animal kingdom can mean becoming somebody else’s lunch.

Yet we women will stand there questioning ourselves.

Maybe I’m overreacting.

Maybe he’s just being friendly.

Maybe I’m imagining things.

Nope. You don’t need a signed confession, three witnesses, and a detective from the homicide division to give yourself permission to leave an uncomfortable situation.

Not every uneasy feeling means danger, and instincts aren’t foolproof. But you are absolutely allowed to trust yourself enough to walk away.

And for the record, being polite to a stranger is not more important than getting home safely.

Personal safety isn’t about living scared

I refuse to spend my life afraid of everything. I’m going to travel, go shopping, meet people, take walks, and live my life.

But I’m also going to pay attention.

True security isn’t just about protecting your digital identity or locking your doors. It’s about feeling confident and prepared wherever you go.

Whether you’re walking across a college campus, commuting late, traveling solo, or crossing a parking lot after dark, a little preparation makes sense.

And no, I’m not suggesting you need to carry enough equipment to survive a zombie apocalypse.

Although, based on some of the things I’ve watched, I’ve considered it.

Build your everyday readiness kit

I like the idea of a small everyday carry (EDC) kit. Things you can keep in your purse, backpack, or car without looking like you’re preparing for a military operation.

Here are a few things worth considering.

Personal safety alarms

A small alarm attached to your keys or purse can make a loud noise when activated, helping draw attention if you need assistance.

Look for something easy to reach and operate.

Because an emergency is not when you want to discover your safety device requires a seven-step activation process.

Stun guns and personal protection devices

Compact stun guns, pepper gel, and other personal protection devices are options some women consider for their everyday safety kits.

I understand the appeal of having another option available.

But I also believe in knowing exactly what you’re carrying. Understand the device’s limitations, follow manufacturer instructions, learn applicable laws, and store it safely.

These devices aren’t harmless, and they’re not guarantees of protection. They’re tools that require responsible decisions.

And remember, the goal isn’t to win a confrontation. The goal is to get somewhere safe.

Compact flashlights

Not exactly glamorous, but incredibly useful.

A small rechargeable flashlight can help you find your keys, navigate dark areas, or see what’s around you.

Sometimes the most practical item in your purse isn’t the prettiest one.

Portable phone chargers

Ladies, your phone sitting at 2% battery while you’re out alone is not the adventure we need.

Keep a compact charger available so you can contact someone, navigate, or access emergency services when necessary.

Don’t forget digital safety

The world has changed. Protecting yourself also means protecting your information.

My everyday readiness recommendations include digital tools such as:

  • Privacy screen protectors: Help prevent people sitting beside you from casually reading your screen.
  • Hardware security keys: Add phishing-resistant protection to compatible accounts.
  • Emergency phone settings: Set up emergency contacts, learn your phone’s SOS features, and review who has access to your location.
  • Strong account security: Use unique passwords and multifactor authentication.

Nobody needs a stranger looking over their shoulder while they’re checking their bank account.

And nobody needs to discover their accounts have been compromised because they clicked a suspicious message.

That’s an entirely different kind of crime documentary.

What watching true crime has taught me

Besides making me suspicious of anyone who says, “I have a great life insurance policy on my spouse.”

I’ve learned that paying attention to behavior matters.

Someone ignoring your boundaries, refusing to take no for an answer, trying to isolate you, or repeatedly making you uncomfortable deserves your attention.

You don’t have to explain away behavior that concerns you.

Make an excuse. Leave. Call someone. Ask for help. Do whatever is appropriate to put yourself in a safer situation.

And please don’t mistake this for blaming anyone who has experienced violence. The responsibility always belongs to the person who chooses to harm someone. No one can predict or prevent every dangerous situation.

I just want women to feel comfortable making decisions that protect their own well-being.

We spend so much time being taught to smile, be nice, and avoid making scenes.

Sometimes making a scene is perfectly acceptable.

Shop my personal protection & everyday readiness picks

I’ve put together a collection of practical safety essentials and everyday tools in my Amazon storefront.

Whether you’re building your own kit, sending a daughter off to college, commuting, or traveling on your own, you can explore options that fit your lifestyle.

Explore my Amazon storefront

Featured product links:

A final thought from someone who watches entirely too much murder TV

I hope none of us ever needs a personal alarm, a defensive device, or an emergency plan.

I hope the strange noise outside really is just a raccoon. I hope the person walking behind you really is just going in the same direction. And I hope all those true crime documentaries are nothing more than my questionable choice of entertainment.

But I also hope women stop dismissing that little voice telling them something isn’t right.

You do not need to prove someone is dangerous before deciding you don’t feel safe around them.

Trust yourself. Pay attention. Be prepared.

And if your gut tells you to leave, leave.

You can worry about being polite once you’re safely home, watching Dateline with the doors locked.

Some links in this article may be affiliate links, meaning I may earn a commission at no additional cost to you.

The short list

Everything in this story, in one list.

  1. ★

    My Amazon storefront

    Personal protection and everyday readiness picks, all together.

    Explore
  2. 01

    Birdie personal safety alarm

    On your keys.

    View
  3. 02

    Keychain pepper spray, lavender

    Lavender, one.

    View
  4. 03

    Keychain pepper spray, two-pack

    Black, two.

    Find it
  5. 04

    TEKRKEJ folding stun gun, pink

    Folds flat.

    View
  6. 05

    TEKRKEJ 668 stun gun with flashlight

    With a flashlight.

    View
  7. 06

    Tactical pen with glass breaker

    Breaks a window.

    View
  8. 07

    Black stun gun

    Direct link.

    View

As an Amazon Associate, Cashmere Brunch earns from qualifying purchases.

Questions people actually ask

What belongs in a small everyday readiness kit?

A personal safety alarm you can reach in one motion, a compact rechargeable flashlight, a portable phone charger, and, if it is legal where you live and you have learned how to use it, a personal protection device such as pepper gel or a compact stun gun. It should fit in the purse, backpack or car you actually carry, not a bag you leave at home.

Are personal safety alarms worth carrying?

They are small, inexpensive and legal almost everywhere, and they do one thing: make a loud noise that draws attention. They are not a guarantee that help will come. Pick one you can activate in a second without looking at it, and test it so you know what it sounds like.

Are stun guns and pepper spray legal to carry?

It depends on where you live and where you are going. Laws vary by state, city and country, and many campuses, venues, airlines and government buildings have their own rules. Check the law where you live and where you travel before you buy, follow the manufacturer's instructions, and store the device safely. Nothing on this page is legal advice.

How do I set up my phone's emergency features?

Both iPhone and Android phones have an emergency SOS feature, emergency contacts and a medical ID you can set up in the phone's settings. Learn the button sequence before you need it, add the people you would want called, and review which apps and people can see your location.

Isn't all of this just living in fear?

No. The point is the opposite: a little preparation means you can travel, shop, walk and meet people without second-guessing yourself. Paying attention and trusting your instincts is not the same as being afraid.

Do you earn from the links on this page?

Yes. We're an Amazon Associate and earn from qualifying purchases, at no extra cost to you.

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